Help an Abuser

One of the difficult things about helping an abuser is that as much as we want them to change, we don’t have the power to make them change.  Only they have the power to change their abusive behaviors.  Most therapists will recommend that both partners in an abusive relationship seek counseling, but it is often unsafe and unhelpful to go together.  The issues each faces are different, and sometimes the patterns have been repeated so many times that it takes breaking away from each other to learn new healthy behaviors.  There are support groups available for both abusers and survivors of domestic violence.  NEWS can give you information about where to find help.

You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. -- Joan Baez